How we speak to ourselves

If you observe how you talk to yourself you will most likely find that you talk to yourself in quite a negative way – “I’m so stupid – why did I say that, do that, not see that” etc.
This is caused by fear – fear of doing the wrong thing, getting it wrong, not being liked/approved of, being rejected. We have believed that self criticism is the only way to ensure safety, inclusion.
Yet criticism only makes us feel unlovable and unworthy. So why would we continue in this habit?
Love and firmness is what will serve us and help us to feel good about ourselves and give of our
 best.
The key is to love and praise yourself and be ready to learn from your mistakes.  Be firm with yourself too, and clear about what you are aspiring to.
Say often to yourself “I love you” [ saying your name too] and “You are doing so well”. This encourages you and moves you on to more and better.
You need to decide that you truly want to learn to speak to yourself with love and firmness – sell this idea to yourself. Then practice this and constantly remind yourself that this is what you want – with love and firmness.
And it is so worth it.

 

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